121-afrides1.doc

The link above is to my peer review draft for the paper that I am writing for my English Class.  As I have previously stated in one of my other blogs, my paper is on shopaholics.  If anyone would like to give me some imput I am very open to any suggestions.  We were supposed to ask three questions which you can find in the link to my paper, but here they are again in case you want to see them,

·         Do I speak about too many items and should I focus more on one rather than another?

·         Is my grammar well done?

·         Are there any other suggestions that you have about my paper?

      I’m not sure that people understand the severity that being a shopaholic can be.  I hope that people who have this problem learn how to solve their problem so that they don’t become some of the people who are in extreme debt.  There are so many people who lose so much money on things that they don’t need.  This problem is a great deal like the problem of gamblers.  These are the people who don’t care where their money goes, and then wonder why they are broke.  There are so many people who lose their homes, cars, and everything else that they own because of stupid decisions.  There are always some who lose money in the stock market, but at least those are not quite on the same level as people who are gamblers.  Everything in moderation is fine, but it is when things get out of hand and people start to go overboard that things start to get bad.  People need to learn how to control themselves because it is only with self-control that they will stay out of problems that could eventually destroy their lives.  I only hope that you enjoy the paper and I hope that if you are one of these people and shop to the extent that these people shop, that you will finally learn the possible damages it may cause.